Posts tagged ‘husband’

MarriageTruth – Husband’s Spiritual Leadership

Of course we all know that husbands should be the head of the household.  As much as us women are smart, articulate, money savvy and educated, according to the Word, the man should assume that leadership role as the head.  Of course, any smart man, knows when its time to defer to his wife…he DID marry us after all, and I think its safe to say, a man knows his wife’s area of expertise.  If he’s worth his salt, he also knows marriage is a partnership in many ways, and sometimes the best results are achieved when each person is allowed to exercise their strengths and cover the areas where the other is weak.

The area I want to talk about today is spiritual leadership in the household.  My husband and I both have grown up in the church, so we had a certain level of spiritual maturity entering the marriage.  However, I felt deep down that we both were not where we ought to be.

I don’t know what it is about marriage (or having kids, so I’ve heard) but I know that once you start getting older, it’s like you start seeing a relationship with God differently.  Its not a chore anymore especially when you have to pay a mortgage, or your marriage begins to hit a rough patch, or a friend’s parent passes away, or you begin to experience trouble at he workplace, and/or the economy enters a mini depression. You start to realize, church isn’t something that my mom or dad makes me go to everyday, its something I need.  I crave a relationship with God, otherwise…this life may just become too much to bear.  You start to pray more, worship more and really acknowledge God in all of your ways.

Growing up, I was blessed to have a strong man of God in my home.  I know many people, don’t get to experience that, so I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I was truly blessed to have a father in my home.  Not only was my daddy there, he used to MAKE us have Bible study, outside of church.  And boooooooooooy, I hated it.  He sometimes would make us have Bible study during “TGIF” (yall remember that Friday night television line-up of Family Matters, Step by Step, and Full house?!)!!! I remember being sooo angry as he would make us read out of the Bible in the King James Version and translate what that meant in everyday language (no NIV or Message Bible here)!  Jerome Peters was (and still IS) the truth. I say all of that to say, I had a CLEAR image of what a man should look like as he leads his family in the ways of God.

I also knew my husband and I were young – we were just getting into this marriage thing and we didn’t have to be there, yet…right??!! WRONG.  Life came at my and me husband during our first year of marriage.  Don’t get me wrong, we did everything right, on paper.  We OFFICIALLY joined our church as soon as we got married (Shout Out to Jericho City of Praise!), we went to New Member Foundations classes on FRIDAY NIGHTS (lol, seriously, we did!), and we even went to a lot of Wednesday night bible studies.  Most people would read that and say – Good, what else do you need to do?

MORE….waaaaay more! I remember our pastor once said, you pray, fast and do whatever you need to go get a blessing/breakthrough.  Then once you get it, you stop.  He then went on to say, whatever you did to get to the blessing, you need to do 3 times more to sustain it! #truth!

My husband and I prayed, fasted, cried, and everything else in between while we were building our home and paying for our wedding, so everything would be in place when we got married.  Yet, once we got married, it was like we were cool with just maintaining…doing the bare minimum.

Things had to change. We started praying and seeking God OUTSIDE of church.  This thing isn’t just limited to Sundays, we both learned. We purchased three powerful books:  The Power to Change your Marriage and the Power of a Praying Wife/Husband all by Stormie Omartian.  These powerful little books were the stepping stone to change in our marriage. 

My husband is now SUCH a wonderful spiritual leader in our house.  He covers me in prayer and sends me daily scriptures.  We pray for each other and we pray, corporately together.  We still haven’t gotten to the Bible study where he makes me translate the KJV to plain English (LOL), but we’re on a clear path. 

I say this loooooooooong story to tell you, its never too late to start strengthening your marriage with prayer.  God will bring out the best in your husband and you will see him start to take a natural leadership role in your marriage.  It’s SUCH an awesome sight to see and I have to say, there is nothing more powerful, more touching, more endearing or SEXIER than a praying, power-filled man of GOD.

MMM MMMM MMM

#Marriagetruth

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I’m Married!!!!

What can I say….we did it!!!

married

It was beautiful. 

Behind the scenes was stressful.  

It was one of the hardest things I ever did.

and one of the most rewarding, awesome, completely breathtaking moments ever.

Our friends were amazing. 

Our families were phenomenal.

People prayed for us and God smiled on our day.

Here’s a couple of pictures:

 

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groupformal girls

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Professional Photos 2-7 by ErinMarie Photography (Pictures 1 and 8 done by family friend)

More to come from marriage world as I continue life’s journey as a Mrs.  😉

lackoffocuschangeindirection

42-22584746I had big dreams of what I would accomplish on the educational front for myself this year.  I ambitiously vowed to take the LSATs, while simultaneously planning for my wedding in the “not so busy” months.  Of course, as you can see, my life has been completely inundated with planning for and buying the house and planning for this wedding.  I’ve immersed myself in all details wedding and all things marriage that I haven’t been about to begin to see outside of anything that does not have to do with that!

I’ve even begun thinking about children! HUH!??! Where did that come from? And WHAT happened to the 2-3 year plan?! I asked myself. 

Personally, I blame the neighborhood, filled with 20-30 something young African American couples who have recently married and 1/2 of which push strollers and cute toy dogs around the neighborhood as the sun is setting. 

And I wonder if they have the key? And am I on this career path that will eventually pull me away from all of the important things in life? I have to honestly ask myself what really makes me happy….and where do I want to spend my hours at the end of the long work day? Putting in MORE hours of OT (even though I’m salaried) or at home, with my large handsome sweet soon to be husband, our future dog, and our not yet conceived children?

The thought of it all scares me actually…so much so that after the flurry has died down, I’m going to sit with myself and think about where I REALLY want to go in life and where is God leading me. 

Wondering if this is all a phase…that I’m just caught up in my new family and these feelings will pass…

Or maybe I’m in a new state of marriage thinking that has brought out something in me that I never knew existed….

We’ll see.

Stay tuned 🙂