All women have it…but all black women that are natural?!? We really get it in more ways than one.  To Relax or not to Relax? That is the question….

I’ve been natural every since 2006.  I cut my hair completely off…the BC (Big Chop).2x11105233

I shed an old relationship, my hair insecurities and everything I’ve been taught about hair ALL at the same time and I thought I would never look back! Well, I definitely moved on in the men department (praise God!) but I see myself slightly turning back to the hair thing, LOL….

My current hair has grown and its as long as it was before I cut it.  Here’s  pic of it not straightened:

1639712(Ignore the girl in the pink, LOL)

and its about this long when it’s straightened:


The problem is – I’ve been on a rampage about how my hair is done, saying such bold statements as I will NEVER put chemicals in my hair again to alter it’s natural state of curliness (pump yo fist in the air…now – ha ha).  I’ve inspired a TON of women to go natural…how can I have second thoughts?  I’ve just always envisioned myself having long beautiful straight tresses on my wedding day. 


 I don’t want to feel natural, bohemian, deep or proud on my wedding day, I just want to feel light, airy and beautiful!

I think your hairstyles say a lot about you…your mood, what you believe in, how you’re feeling about yourself, you’re self-esteem, whether you felt like doing it that morning, everything!!  I mean, literally, when I voted for Barack, I PURPOSEFULLY wore my hair in in my curly bush! with my UNITY colored, “MY VOTE COUNTS” tshirt on!  When I’m feeling funky, I’ll rock my fro, wild and crazy! When I’m feeling chill, I’ll straighten my hair and wear it with a headband.  When I’m feeling elegant, I’ll pin it up and curl it.

Here’s the reason why I’m so stressed about it.  Its going to be hot and sticky on my wedding day and its going to be outdoors.  I DO NOT want a baby afro, when my hair decides it wants to soak up the moisture!! I can get my hair VERY straight, if I want to, but it’s a matter of it taking in the humidity and slowly turning back into the afro you see above!


Soo Sooo TORN!

and I don’t know if want to wear braids – I never envisioned myself with micros on my wedding day….


Any suggestions? I’m thinking about pulling it back and then adding hair, so that it looks like its my natural hair and I don’t have to worry about sweating it out, but I need pics! Perhaps something like this?

updos-bundle-of-joy_full or this?



I also thought about relaxing it for that day only, and then doing the BC (again) the very next day….shooooot, i miss my short hair too! LOL



p.s. thanks to all of my facebook/natural buddies, who’ve helped me out with this, this morning!