Archive for September, 2008

Change in direction


I’ve decided to use this blog as a platform to talk about everything I feel, except Personal Finance – as I already have a blog dedicated to this function. Many times I’ve tried to do that on this blog, but it seems like every time I tried to put my fingers to the keyboard, what I type comes out poetic, thoughtful and less like a conversation. So what ends up happening is, I feel this immense amount of pressure when it comes to this blog – because the stuff I wrote before is freaking good! Like its some deep, feeling, emotional, type stuff. So I always feel like I’m competing with myself to make this blog entry better than the rest.

Which results in my being afraid of this blog.
Yep, I said it…I’m scared of my Collection of Moments blog – and I embrace my Personal Finance blog b/c there’s no pressure there to say clever metaphors, sassy comebacks and convey deep emotion.
So the end result – I’m going to still allow this blog to be a collection of “moments” – who said each moment has to be filled with love? or well written? or deep?
No one!
So today – I’m still sorta struggling with the fact that I have to keep my nails done – my mom’s MAKING me. Ever since I got my engagement ring….this has been a continuous personal committment. I want to stop it, but its like drugs, you cannot break the habit! Acrylic makes your nails brittle, so its like you HAVE to keep the nails and they do look SOO much better, especially when you’re CONSTANTLY showing your hands off. But I hate the maintenence, monetary and time committment and I hate when it get old!! Cleaning up, more opportunity to BREAK them and it HURTS when it gets hit the wrong way! GRRR…so I’m at a crossroads – what to do? what to do?
In other news – I work at Freddie Mac….I think that’s about all I need to say about that.
I’ve come to figure out that I LOVE hosting events – ONLY if they are well executed by me. LOL. I hate it when I’m not in control and I need for all things to be according to schedule. Making people wait and not being on time – makes me not-so-happy.
Wedding planning – I hate these retarded wedding vendors who take FOREVER to get back to you….errrr what? I mean seriously – I asked you ONE question, just write back…and then let me decide whether or not I want to sign your contract, thanks.
Oh yeah, word to the wise – when you’re engaged to someone, you enter into this new “wedding planning” land with them – and let’s just say, the pressure to put on this “event” (yes, I’m aware that I chose that word) makes you and the love of your life act a bit out of character…just a bit. Needless to say, your love has to be strong and your patience loooooong (on both sides). Let me just say for the record – the qualities that I LOVE about my fiance – are so annoying during the planning process (yep, again, I SAID IT!!!)!!! I LOVE that my baby is a strong educated male. One with great opinions and ideas that are sometimes the opposite of mines. I love that he doesn’t back down from a challenge and I’m always proud to call him a MAN, MY MAN 🙂
This (what I just described)…not soo cute when you’re questioning why I don’t wanna wear a veil!! Because I DON’T WANNA!!! lol….
he’s going to kill me when he sees this (sad face)
I love you pook-tastic 😉
I also love that he’s secure enough to not even flinch when I call him the craziest pet names, in public and his boys laugh at him…and he still answers me like he didn’t hear them (kisses on the cheek)!
Love – in general – aside from the wedding planning – GOSH – I’ve learned so much for you! I’ve seen you in different forms, manifesting in friends, coworkers and associates…
and I’m going to be honest – I hate how the quest for you dominates people so much and turns them into a shell of the person they once were. I love how you make me feel every time I fall to sleep in my finace’s arms. I love the person I’ve turned into because of you. I hate the lack of you in the world. I love the passionate version of you. I love the calm, every day – “I could sit and play on the computer, while he watches the football game” version of you. I love when I see you and you’re real 🙂 I LOATHE imitators of you. I love the GOD in you….Love – I LOVE you!
Ignorance…I feel sorry for people who operate in it. Stupidity – definitely detest you…
I want a raise….now. I guess it’s true, the more you make the more you want to make? Or something like that…..
I’ve been thinking about baby names for my children lately – I swear I can see those little jokers running around our future house….it makes me excited. I’m SO ready to be a wife. Like really ready – I want to embrace this next phase of my life, head on. I love cooking for my fiance. I hate cleaning – but I love the feeling get when my apartment is clean and he comes over and says my new comforter I picked out is pretty. I love my Sam’s Club membership – I like shopping in bulk. I went to the grocery store the other day and scoffed at the prices – out loud. I love making decisions with someone who’s opinion I value, I respect and think the world of (I’m the girl in the picture above, discussing major life decisions with my eternal partner *smile*) Making someone else happy is a great challenge that I embrace, I try to find the cutest e-cards, coupon books and other random tokens of affection so I can “outdo” him in the race of love. I like hanging out with other couples (read: cool couples) – and I looooooooove going to church with my fiance and holding his hand during the sermon. I’m excited for pre martial counseling and in 2-3 years…I cannot wait to have his children. I’m a sap – whatever, talk about me. I used to be one of the naysayers and I’m an in-love loser – and i LOVE it. HECK, I even like PUBLIC DISPLAYS OF AFFECTION!!! THAT’S RIGHT!!! I’m sure some people who used to know me in high school and college are like, WHAT?!?! WHO!??! Yep – it’s me…
That’s today’s collection of moments – I’ll be back tomorrow 🙂

I laugh in the face of a challenge!!

The power of positive thinking is something that means a lot to me. And the older I get, the more I realize that I can do ANYTHING that I put my mind too. I can attract worthwhile people and opportunities. I can make the BEST of anything, just simply by being in the right frame of mind. I try to tell people this, but lots of times, I think I’m preaching to deaf ears. So many times I keep it to myself.

I also laugh in the face of a so called “challenge.” I can do ALL THINGS to Christ who strenghtens me…so I’m laughing, because I already know, that I can do it…

Which brings me to my present situation. I’ve looked on the Century 21, Long and Foster and Coldwell Real Estate Listing sites over the past week and I cannot believe my eyes. I’m talking single family homes, in the DC METRO AREA for less than $250,000!!!

I talked to my groom and he was like – are we going to regret waiting a year after we get married (two years), especially if we miss out on these INSANE prices??

Me -Agreed babe, we will be quite pissy.

So…the plan now is how can we still finance our wedding and take advantage of the market (especially since, it’s trying to take advantage of most Americans!!) Pushing the wedding back, isn’t an option, since the deposit has been paid, BTW. We’re going to think, pray and meditate on it for 30 days. Go over our finances and see if we can afford it, along with the wedding stuff….

Of course there are some things that may have to be shuffled around…but that’s all a work in progress. The 30 days will answer many questions, affirmatively. And once those questions have been answered – we can see what our options are…

So bloggers and blog readers alike, if you understand the power of prayer, keep us lifted up. We have a ton of decisions to make (I’m only alluding to some on here, you’ll find out all, once everything goes smoothly). I know we can do it.

And I’m chuckling…

There’s no mountain that God can’t move 🙂

Wedding Vision/Budget

Oh Ms. Blog – how I have missed thee! I’ve noticed since I haven’t been writing as much, I don’t feel as FREE as I normally do.

So off I go, to vent the frustrations of being a bride to be aka fiancee’.

The main thing my boo and I are trying to accomplish is financing our wedding for less than $30,000. I know, I know – an amazing feat, lofty goal, blah blah blah – but I think we can do it. My fiance – not so much faith – he’s already budgeted to spend $35,000. I think he’s seriously over projecting, but he’s one of those guys that would rather over estimate than under estimate.

I personally, think we can do for….drum rooooooooll – a whopping $25,000. So we’re talking a substantial difference in pricing here. The main reason is Location, location, location. We’re having our wedding in Richmond Virginia and if you don’t know, the Cost of Living is MUY cheapo, compared to DC – where we both live. An attorney who sits behind me is planning a wedding up here and she LAUGHED when I told her she could have a decent wedding in Richmond for under $50/plate. She said she would CRY to see those numbers.
My main goal is to have something classy, elegant, yet FUN…all in one, for cheap! But I will not cut corners on things that need to be done correctly. For example, food – black folks like good food – and there will be good food at our wedding. LOL. I know that’s a stereotype, generalization, blah blah blah – but it’s true, at least the folks I know. They’re going to talk about you like a dog, if you’re food isn’t right.
So – we’re in the process of booking our venue. I don’t want to give it away just yet, b/c things aren’t final yet. Plus I don’t want any copycats, LOL. The food at this place is well known, so I know our visitors will be happy. We were about to do an adult only reception, but we found out kids 6 and under were free and youth 6-12 are 1/2 price.
We’re also doing a brunch 🙂 I’ve ALWAYS wanted to have a brunch reception – I love the food, the diversity of the menu and the PRICE 🙂 I hated how everyone would say, “if you want a cheap wedding – have chicken” So its like every time you see chicken, you think hmmm – they’re cheap. When in all actuality, the couple may have just liked poultry!

And it seemed like you just had to cut SOO many corners to achieve an elegant affair, on a Saturday evening and everyone could tell you were trying to save money. I say, to HECK with that – have a lavish Saturday brunch affair – with a great menu that caters to breakfast and lunch appetites!! Recently, a friend got married in the mid morning/early afternoon – and all I kept saying to myself is, “I hope they have a brunch menu!” and they did! It was such a smooth execution and restored confidence in my original idea to do it.
I want a beautiful venue – this is two fold because you can cut decoration costs, by having your event at a place that needs nothing to make it bling 🙂 Yet, you still have to pay for location. So it’s a balancing act. The place we’re booking is on a lake. It’s professionally landscaped, so there’s no need to spend vast amounts of money on decorating budget. It’s elegant, it’s natural, it’s GREAT 🙂

2nd reception…there’s so many things that my baby and I are known for and one of them is HAVING A GOOD TIME. There’s no way we can have the type of reception we want and give the guests what they want unless we have a second reception. We will save cost b/c it will be a cash bar, for those who drink. Our morning affair will have a champagne OR sparkling apple cider toast (SAVINGS $6000!!!) We will have light appetizers, but nothing major. We’ve already paid for you that morning 🙂 LOL

The main things (vendor wise) we need to work out is getting a wedding coordinator, decor for the reception (mostly centerpieces), florist, the photographer (I have a strong lead), and the wedding cake.

Such work to do – but we can breath now. When I first started writing this – we didn’t have our venue, but now it’s official 🙂 The Gardens at Sunday Park – here we come!!! We officially have a date and a venue – YAHOO!! I’m going to relax for about a month!